2011 is drawing to a close and I have to say I’m ready for it to be over. But it has definitely brought to light my focus and priorities like never before.
Therefore, here’s a short list of what I am thankful for in the hardest year of my life.
I am thankful for my Dad. You’ve help shaped me into the man I am; and your persistence and drive is what I draw on daily. You, too, are having what I can only imagine is the hardest year of your life as well, and I love you dearly.
I am thankful for my Mom. Your emotion and unconditional love has always been a beacon for my soul. Your strength in taking care of your health so you can spread that love for years to come has inspired me.
I am thankful for Cannon. You teach me daily about patience and that, oddly enough, I am not the center of the universe. You are. Your curiosity and untainted view of the world has taught me to leave behind my preconceived notions about life in general, and to spend more time learning and discovering than cynically disliking everyone and everything.
I am thankful for Amy. Even after 13 years, you have unearthed a strength, a resolution, and a tenacity in me that I never thought possible. You and I have lived our highest highs and lowest lows together; and with that I have woken up to the things in life that mean the most to me. Words, actions, thoughts, feelings, and confidence in what I wholly want to be. I could never write a song that would encompass how I feel. Always and all ways.
I am thankful for Donna and Pat. I have spent a good part of my life ignoring any spiritual connection to anything. Your unflinching love and support throughout the years has taught me that spirituality has nothing to do with what deity you choose to believe in, but your relationship to the world around you and the choices (or lack of) that you make regarding that world and those relationships. You are two of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met. I’m honored to call you family.
I am thankful for Casey, Lynn, and Jeff. My brothers. Whether we are close or distant, we always seem to be on the same wavelength. There are times when we don’t particularly care for each other, and I can honestly say that the constant there was me. But I know you all love me and though I’ve spent a lot of time trying to play the role of the wisest and oldest, I now want to just be your loving brother, friend, and equal.
I am thankful for the Maxwells. No greater family of friends has ever existed. I owe you all a lifetime of favors and love.
I am thankful for all my bandmates, past and present (well, not really present, but you know…). I went through one of the most amazing experience of my life with all of you, and you were all equally talented and patient. I miss you more than you guys could ever know.
I am thankful for all the friends I have had over the years. Drifting in and out of touch makes it hard for me to ever verbalize how much I miss you when I am away from you. And the fact that after all the years you’ve shown the capacity and willingness to endure the gruff, controlling, and overbearing person that I could be is a testament to the trueness of our friendships. I could never begin to list all your names here – but you definitely know who you are. I’ve begun reconnecting with many of you simply because if I was judged by the quality of people I associated with, you all would make me a king.
I am thankful for music. If one thing could define the very core of my being, it’s that music has always been the substance of my heart. Whether creating it or enjoying it, it’s always been my passenger in life.
I am thankful for having such an undefinably amazing job. If you look at my path to get here, it doesn’t make sense. But it’s one thing to have a good job, and a completely different thing to love your work. I get both.
Finally, I am thankful for me. I am thankful that in the face of the hardest of adversities that I am enduring this year, I have begun to triumph over them. I am putting aside all that is expected of me (by me) and becoming the person I’ve always wanted to be. I don’t want to be a different man, just always a better one. I want to be sure to love myself as much as you all have loved me. I owe it to your steadfastness in sticking by me to do that. You’ve seen me in a way that I want to see myself. And that road is paved in gold.
I love you all.
